Friday, November 23, 2012

I wish I had a Repeat Button

I wish I had a Repeat button. So I could start this song over and over and it would never end.
I wish a had a Repeat button so this day would never cease. So I could repeat the Best day before the Worst.
I wish I had a Repeat button so I could hear you tell me you love me over and over again to block out the pain from when you stopped telling me.
I wish I had a Repeat button so I'd never have to leave my Grandpa's lap, he'd never stopped telling me what a cute shit I was, and he'd never stop asking what grade I was.
I wish I had a Repeat button so we could still be children and and our only problem was who was going to play Ken and who would play Barbie.

I wish I had a Repeat button so the leaves always stayed green, the flowers never died, the sun never went down, the water never stopped running and my heart never started hurting and my hair never stopped waving and my feet never stopped touching, and I never stopped laughing.
I wish I had a Repeat button to make life a liar and never start growing.

I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend


Sunday, November 18, 2012

How to avoid Pain

Today Ladies and Gents i'm going to show you how to get rid of Pain, the question everyone is asking for.
First, we'll start with physical pain. You will need an astronaut suit with heavy duty padding. Now this suit can NOT protect you from being hit by a car. But that leads us to Step 2 of avoiding physical pain and that is never going past 100 feet of your home. You can avoid germs, cars, bikes, and people, so you are set. j

Now for emotional pain, which honestly folks is everyone's least favorite. To achieve this you will need to go out and buy every book you can on any subject you want to learn about, then get rid of your computer, your television and your windows, because letting the human race inside can only cause damage. After you've stalked up on the books, stalk up on food. Because if you never leave your house again you will starve unless you have a life supply. So get all the goodies you need, so you will NEVER leave your house. After you are stalked up, fake your death so everyone will leave you alone. Remember, this is most important, PEOPLE = PAIN. Even if people don't try to hurt you, sometimes they will, and sometime people DO try to hurt you, so better to be safe then sorry.

Honestly the best thing to do to avoid pain, better then any of those steps, STOP LIVING YOUR LIFE. It's amazing how if you just stop taking risks, stop falling in love, stop moving, stop feeling, ANYTHING you can't feel pain. Because if you can't feel love you can never feel hate. If you can't feel joy you will never feel sadness. If you can't feel Life you can't feel Pain. Because Life is Pain, and it is BEAUTIFUL.

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Today I met myself

I met a vampire today
He told me he was a creature of the dark and that I was just like him. He told me to come to the shadows because that's where I belong. He told me all the things that were wrong with me. He told me I was prideful, greedy, devious, and extorting Life out of Universe. He showed me where I belonged, and told me to join him.

And I said to Hell with that.

I am a creature of the light because I am full of light. I am full of light and power and freedom. I don't hide my flaws in the black I bring my flaws to the white, and turn them into color. I bring Life into Universe because without me this Life would be black, not even a white canvas full of the anticipation of possibility; but black, void and empty. I am a bruised, painted, morphing piece of flesh; i'm not a lost soul stuck in mortality and never changing. I am change, I am flow, I am the trees and birds and the river. I am the breath, blood, and heart. I am Human.

Monday, November 12, 2012

Grand thief at Poetry

The world and its mistress returned to his house; and twinkled hilariously on his lawn. But with a potential second outcome at stake, there's an inherent pressure. I reckon it was going to be a grand surprise to him. When he was innocent but proven guilty; but they may withdraw. Because he's been practically ripping her clothes off every time there's been a camera.
But what didn't she like about it?
Can you remember? Did he kill her captain too? Her captain nodded as if he expected as much.
The only problem after she sank, she combined speed with surprise. He said oh "what do I care?" one final element of subordinate behavior deserves consideration and the creep did not get fired. But Saturday was chosen for her expulsion. Her father wasn't there. So she dropped out, she worked a lot
She doesn't understand.

I passed


Sunday, November 4, 2012

Do you remember?

Do you remember singing songs about Hobos? And thinking we could make it big. Do you remember watching rated R movie in your basement? You never told me, and my innocence was lost forever. Remember when you gave me vodka? Yeah you never told me about that one too. Do you remember inventing rides and making me be the guinea pig? I remember my scars, they still show on my knees. Do you remember making the Hyper Blaster 3000 and we couldn't stop laughing? Remember when we put dirt in water and made Tyler drink it because we told him it was chocolate milk? Remember when he actually did? Remember making water balloons and using them as pets? And we cried when they popped. Remember singing to Buffy the Vampire Slayer? Did you know I still have the songs memorized? Remembering when we cried at the end of season 7?

Remember sliding off your mattress onto the floor, and I learned my first Icelandic word. Remember making a Mormon Cappuccino? and filming a commercial for it? Remember my awful perm? Remember my Capri's? Well you should you made fun of me for wearing them (they weren't baby pants!) Remember when we came to High school and became loosers who eat lunch with Mr. Nelson because people scare us? Yeah I remember the good times.

Yeah, I remember.

Lex
 I remember listening to music so I couldn't hear myself cry. I remember watching you fall down the stairs because you passed out. I remember thinking you were crazy. I remember you making me sit in a corner because when I ate candy it was too noisy for you. I remember telling my friends about you, and they just stared. I remember seeing your guilty defiant face when you ate those six pills. I remember coming to visit you and all I wanted was a hug, not a robot. I remember you screaming at the world, you kept saying "this isn't your fault, this isn't your fault, this isn't your fault..." But I remember that it was.

Lace
I remember coming into your room because you were crying. I don't remember what happened to you, but I remember I was angry. I remember when you'd spit on me, I thought you were a boy. I remember when you'd sneak out, I never told because I remember I wanted you to trust me, But I remember I should've told, maybe I wouldn't have to remember all the memories. I remember you coming home covered in throw up, and you brought a friend with you. I remember when I hugged you goodnight and you smelt funny..you got in trouble that night.  I remember you hating Cabbage Roman noodle salad,  and mason jars and ribs, because it reminded you of him.

But I remember when we'd hold hands and dance around books, and when we touched the book, I remember we had to hit our heads on the table for fun (but I remember too well.) I remember when LMFAO was actually good. I remember singing about pants being too high and how it made his package look reeeaaall nice. I remember singing about dogs in a window and my step grandpa would harmonize (bark bark). I remember going up the canyon and proclaiming to the universe that we were powerful. I remember when we used to beat each other up (and I still have the scar on my head from that key) but I remember we were laughing the whole time. Until you shoved me in the bathtub full of water, then I remember I cried. I remember making up songs about knights and dragons. I remember when we became best friends, and I'll never forget.